Difficulty Enforcing Guidelines

Last week after Common Art, I found myself remarking in a rather ironic statement to my supervisor, the Rev. Pam Werntz, that all the action at Common Art takes place on the stage. In the back of the room is a large stage that some folks opt to sit or lie down on. I’ve noticed over the last few weeks that this tends to be a hotspot for any commotion or behavior that may need some checking in with. This was the case this past week as some tensions arose near the stage a few times throughout the day.

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Setting Boundaries

Isabelle Olsson

In addition to working with Common Art, as a part of my internship I am also spending some time at the Black Seed Writer’s Group offered as a part of MANNA at St. Paul’s Cathedral. This has been such a wonderful opportunity to continue to work with many of the same community members in a different space, through their writing I get to see a different side of their creativity that often compliments their artwork. This past week, as I left the Black Seed Writer’s Group I found myself a bit stuck on the concept of negotiating boundaries. I had a few small moments throughout the day that tested my boundaries as a new member of the community and had me reflecting on what boundaries should look like. In some ways, I felt like I had foundered in a few moments where I could have set firmer boundaries. Continue reading

Boundary Setting

Given the stigma of mental illness, discussing therapy in public has often been considered to be “inappropriate.” Many people are still ashamed or uncomfortable to admit they go to therapy or struggle with mental illness. For this reason, I try to normalize therapy, mental illness, and treatment by talking of such things in my everyday conversations. With that in mind, last week my therapist pointed out to me that I focus more on my perceived failings rather than my successes, as if my having made a mistake or something in general having gone wrong immediately overrides any strides I’ve made. We’d been discussing setting healthy boundaries, something I sometimes struggle with. After an initial boundary-setting success, a different boundary line was crossed, and I suddenly felt incapable and incompetent—how could I be so foolish to think I’d accomplished something? Yet, as my supervisors and therapist pointed out, just because there are “setbacks” or times when healthy boundaries must be reestablished, my success is still a success; the foundation I laid for my boundary-setting skills is still there.

Mistakes

There’s a lemon in life that I’ve been trying to turn into lemonade for quite some time now: mistakes. Logically I understand that mistakes are a part of life and a key element to learning. Some of the world’s greatest inventions, from potato chips to penicillin, were discovered or created accidentally. If I were talking to a friend or a student, I would encourage them to try different things, make mistakes, and learn something new—but me make a mistake in my internship? Surely this would be the end of me, my career over before it started.

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Intention vs. Perception

Do you ever wish there was a way to watch your interactions with others from an outsider’s perspective? Lately I’ve been keenly aware of what an asset it would be to have that reflective ability. I wish to gain an understanding how I am perceived within my interactions at Art and Spirituality, Common Art, and Café Emmanuel. When I was very young I was told by my father that it doesn’t matter how pure or good your intentions are if someone perceives them poorly. Clearly this issue is far more complex than “good” or “bad”, and I’ve found that it holds true for the most part. Understanding perception is something I will be working and reflecting on probably for the rest of my life.

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